Nice guy

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A nice guy is a beta male who acts agreeable and pleasant towards either sex, often shy, socially awkward and bad at flirting. Blackpillers and redpillers accuse nice guys of being bluepilled about women's mating preferences, and predict their best hope is to be betabuxxed to a post-wall femoid, provided femoids are being encouraged to marry very late. Nice guy's niceness and tendency to smile is commonly explained by low dominance status, neuroatypicality, physical weakness, religious or gynocentric domestication, or a genetic disposition for shyness. Many nice guys may genetically be slow life history strategists, programmed to wait to be married which never occurs in modern society.

Women prefer bullies over nice men[edit | edit source]

The Chad is Jeremy Meeks; the looksmatch is St. Blackops2cel.

Contrary to men, women tend to prefer a disagreeable partner during the initial stages of dating once men have passed their LMS test.[1][2] This results in bullies having substantially more sexual partners than the bullied.[3][4][5][6][7][8] This gives men an incentive to act like jerks to avoid being ghosted. Women consequently tend to complain that there are no genuinely nice guys, which is thought to be a shit test, virtue signaling, or self-delusion.

These insights are central to the red pill, black pill, and the countless clickbaity news articles about how "women love psychopaths", and they are related to hybristophilia, i.e. women's sexual interest in criminal and violent males.

The immense contradiction between the socially desired male niceness and goodness and their low sexual success as a result of female mate choice has motivated mass murderers Elliot Rodger and Alek Minassian, claiming themselves to be "supreme gentlemen" and thus deserving female sexual attention. Minassian explicitly stated having been "too nice" to women,[9][10] though later he confessed he was not primarily driven by retaliation against women and only used incel memes as a veneer to gain popularity.[11]

An explanation for women's preference for bullies may be the bodyguard hypothesis. A very nice man can't protect. Excessively warmhearted men are also often perceived as creepy and suspect and manipulative,[12] which they may as well be. Excessive niceness is also awkward signaling as it is perceived as desperate, which in turn points to prior failure and flaws.

Fake nice guys[edit | edit source]

Both womanospherians and manospherians accuse many men of being "fake nice", but in different ways.

Womanospherians seem to have a problem with virtually all genuinely nice guys, but will label them as Nice Guys™ nonetheless (see /r/niceguys). They deem all actual nice guys as fake nice guys, distracting from the fact that women reward anti-social behaviour. They see it as hypocritical when nice guys get angry at the fact that most women in the Western world do not find nice guys sexually attractive. Because anger is often not nice when directed outwardly.

Womanospherians also have a problem with actual fake nice guys, but so does everyone else.

Manospherians are more tolerant to nice guys (see Karen Straughan) but are very critical of men who they perceive as being much more nice to women than as to men, who they call white knights. Both womanospherians and manospherians accuse men who they perceive as nice guys of deceiving women in dating.

Niceness also applied to YouTube video rating (table by EmpLemon)[13]

The "5:1" and "11:1"/"20:1" Theory of Social Conflicts[edit | edit source]

The Magic Ratio[14], invented by Gottman[15] & Levenson, this the idea that any good relationship should be 5:1, or the balance of 5 positive interaction per negative interaction when in conflicts. Relationships that are at the verge to break down tend to be in 0.8:1 range ("Negative Sentiment Override"). Most interpret this as Niceness being a virtue, but as others have noted[16][17], a ratio of 20:1 or higher is often an indicator of "Positive Sentiment Override", which is when one is having a Oneitis leading to a breakdown in social relations. Peterson[18][19][20] also claimed that 11:1 or higher is enough for someone to be considered a Nice Guy.

This ratio is also applicable to children's relationships and friendships, as noted by Gottman. It has been demonstrated that positivity has some correlation to productivity team cohesion[21][22] (5.6:1 for high-performer against the 1.9:1 average). Coincidently, this ratio also coincides with the YouTube "Downvote" ratio[23] on quality and catering vs controversy (<50% is messed up, 50~79% is mistaken, 80~89% is controversial, 90~96% is normal, 97+% is catering). An observation to be made here is that the "niceness" scales exponentially. These ratios are also tied to the Pareto principle, and that the utility of ratings follows a distribution similar to the Log-Normal. An approximation towards an index of deviation from the norm is LOG(100/(6.7*(100-appoval_ratings)))/LOG(1.8), and if the deviation exceeds 1, it is more likely to end badly.

Critique of Gottman's "Solutions"[edit | edit source]

The major critiques against Gottman is that even though the satisfaction correlation can be replicated[24][25][26][27], replications of his "programs" did not yield significant change in distressed low-SES families in independent studies[28]. The same can be applied to the productivity studies, where there is a lack of distinction between platitudes and genuine compliments. This disproves the basic Bluepill of "just talk out your feelings".

Notable nice guys in the incelosphere[edit | edit source]

The following individuals have been indentified as nice guys by normies.

Gallery[edit | edit source]

References[edit | edit source]

  1. https://www.newsweek.com/study-finds-men-nice-women-not-other-way-around-261269
  2. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167214543879
  3. http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/hamilton/brock-bullies-sex-1.4487053 [Archive.fo]
  4. https://rd.springer.com/article/10.1007%2Fs40806-017-0126-4
  5. https://www.deccanchronicle.com/lifestyle/sex-and-relationship/161217/dominance-may-make-bullies-more-attractive-leading-to-more-sex-study.html
  6. https://scottbarrykaufman.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/The-Dark-Triad-Personality.pdf
  7. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/head-games/201310/why-do-women-fall-bad-boys [Archive.fo]
  8. https://www.timesofisrael.com/women-really-dont-go-for-nice-guys-study-indicates/
  9. https://youtube.com/watch?v=qhnd9J6dNSA?t=2418
  10. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qhnd9J6dNSA&t=6882
  11. https://www.ontariocourts.ca/decisions/2021ONSC1258.pdf
  12. https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2009/07/27/the-kindest-cut
  13. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fdGbOT8NXnE
  14. https://thepowermoves.com/how-to-stay-together/
  15. https://www.johngottman.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/Marital-processes-predictive-of-later-dissolution-behavior-physiology-and-health.pdf
  16. https://thrivetherapyflorida.com/2018/08/22/how-to-be-an-emotional-millionaire/
  17. http://couplestraininginstitute.com/gottman-couples-and-marital-therapy/
  18. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQk8W8EnbLs
  19. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fesSvXKxYd0
  20. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9QVQZSSi_m0
  21. http://www.bvsde.paho.org/texcom/cd047472/MLosada.pdf
  22. https://teamcoachinginternational.com/breaking-the-code-on-high-performing-teams/
  23. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fdGbOT8NXnE
  24. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1828692
  25. https://doi.org/10.2307%2F353725
  26. https://silo.tips/download/the-empirical-basis-for-gottman-couples-therapy
  27. https:/doi.org/10.1177/0265407501184005
  28. https://www.wikiwand.com/en/John_Gottman#/Independent_studies_testing_Gottman_marriage_courses

See also[edit | edit source]

Redpill

Game

GameOvergamingFrame (PUA)Signaling theoryRomantic idealizationCourtshipNeggingSexual market valueBeautyCharismaOrbiterBullyingLMSPUAAssholeTalk therapyIndicator of interestDominance hierarchyFuck-off signalsSocial circleSlayerNeurolinguistic programmingDatingOffline datingOnline datingBraggingAnabolic steroidGuitarClown Game

Misc. strategies

SEAmaxxingGymmaxxingTrannymaxxingGymmaxxingStatusmaxxingMoneymaxxingJestermaxxingCastratemaxxing

Pick Up Artists

R. Don SteeleRoss Jeffriesr/TRPReal Social DynamicsRooshVOwen CookPlayer SupremeWinston WuList of people in the seduction community

Ranks

Alpha maleAlpha femaleBeta maleBeta femaleOmega maleOmega femaleSigma maleVox DayDominance hierarchy

Personality

NeurotypicalNeurodivergentCoolCharismaStoicAssholeDark triadBorderline personality disorderNice guySimpApproach anxietyButterflies in the stomachConfidenceShynessLove shyHedonophobiaAsperger's SyndromeSocial awkwardnessIQRationalityEvolutionary psychologyTestosteroneEstrogen

Celibacy states

SexlessnessCelibacyIncelDry spellDating LimboSingleVirginWizardVolcelAsexualSex haverMarriedAscendedRelationship

Sexuality

HypergamyCopulationNudityCasual sexPump and dumpPromiscuityCock carouselRapeSexual harassmentBodyguard hypothesisBetabuxProvisioningMarriage proposalReproductive successSexual envySex driveBateman's principleSexual economics theoryResources for orgasmsSex ratioFemale passivitySexual attractionAttraction ambiguity problemBody attractivenessMuscle theoryFemale orgasmHuman penisHulseyismSexual conflictSlutWhoreLordosisLeggingsPaternity assuranceMicrochimerismFeminine imperativePussy cartelRejection (dating)Ghosting (dating)Shit testAdverse effects of inceldomMaslow's hierarchy of needsCauses of celibacyHomosexualityHomocel hypothesisDemographics of inceldomTeleiophilic delayPolygynyPolyandryMonogamyMarriageTraditionalist conservatismMate guardingMate poachingMate choice copyingIntrasexual competitionFacial masculinityNeotenyParthenophiliaFisherian runawaySexual selectionCreepinessValidationChadsexualHybristophiliaScelerophiliaQuality and primitivity theorySexclamationTumescenceClitorisTesticlesLooks bottleneckGaitIncestpillPraying mantisoidMigraine

Other theories

Timeless quotes on womenFemales are socially ineptWomen-are-wonderful effectGynocentrismApex fallacyFeminismSexual revolutionFemale subordinationFemale hypoagencyFemale solipsismPrincess syndromeLife on tutorial modeFemale privilegeFake depressionFemale sneakinessFemme fataleBriffault's lawJuggernaut lawArguing with holes | Halo effectFailo effectSinglismVariability hypothesisPsychiatryCognitive behavioral therapyAntifragilityTriggeredLife historyScientific Blackpill + Scientific Blackpill (Supplemental)Evolutionary mismatchMutationFeminizationBehavioral sinkPolitical correctness‎Affirmative actionVirtue signalingEugenicsEnvironmentalismMale scarcityRegression toward the meanMatthew effectPatriarchyTutorial IslandEmpathy gapWelfare gameX-factor theoryBuy a wheelchair to pick up women gameClown WorldProblematicIncel crisis coverup