Incel: Difference between revisions

This is the source of a lot of conflict in the [[incelosphere]]. A solution to this longstanding conflict would be an incel definition that rejects [[standardcel]]s but includes non-[[standardcel]] [[mentalcel]]s as incel. This has been formalized before, but has not been popularized or adopted yet by any major forum, perhaps because of the effort required in enforcing such a complicated definition.

The infighting over whether to include [[love-shyness|love-shies]] in incel forums mainly hinges on the meaning of ''involuntary'', and whether involuntary means "without choice" or "against will". However, in different contexts, the word involuntary can mean either, and both are different experiences.

 

The vast majority of men are not asexual or aromantic, so most men that have never been in a relationship are circumstantially lonely rather than because of preference. According to the Center for Disease Control, most Americans have penis-and-vagina intercourse by age 17.<ref>http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nhsr/nhsr036.pdf</ref> Assuming incel to be defined very broadly such that all lifelong single men are incels, then this includes [[demographics of inceldom#Numbers|15-30% of 18-30 year old American men]], a third of which are 18-20 year old American men. Since a very large share of men who have not had any romantic experiences by age twenty will end up doing so at later time, only a minority of these people are likely actually "involuntarily celibate" in the strictest definitions of the term. A better estimate would look at only older heterosexual men. The same CDC report says that 10% of American men age 24 report having no sexual experience. In Japan, a more extreme case, 25% of men over the age of 30 are virgins.<ref>http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/japan/11662500/Rise-of-Japans-middle-aged-virgins-a-quarter-of-over-30s-have-never-had-sex.html</ref> It's thus possible, then, that most 30-year old American or Japenese men have an incel male acquaintance, even if that acquaintance doesn't personally identify as such.

 

Incel life is miserable, especially for the socially disconnected. Isolation and sexlessness are associated with various [[Scientific Blackpill#tocHealth|health risks]]. One study found that losing one's virginity after their mid 20s is associated with [[erectile dysfunction]] and [[anorgasmia]] later in life.<ref>http://web.archive.org/web/20170622044005/https://abcnews.go.com/Health/Sex/story?id=3932047</ref> Another study found that delayed sexual activity "creates health risks by impeding development of the emotional, cognitive, and interpersonal skills that are crucial to satisfactory sexual functioning and general well-being."<ref>https://www.vice.com/en_ca/article/78bmza/the-cost-of-losing-your-virginity-late</ref> Most incels consider their lack of romance one of the worst aspects of their lives, and it's sometimes described by them as the most negative effect of poverty or mental/physical disability.

 

Being [[Love-shy|love-shy]] means fear of engaging in or attempting to start romantic or sexual [[relationship]]s. It is possible for a person to be both incel and [[love-shy]], and many are to a certain degree. For instance, it is common for incels to suffer large numbers of negative courting experiences, and eventually become [[love-shy]] and unable to approach. Love-shyness can sometimes even persist after an incel succeeds in becoming more sexually attractive. Despite this, love-shyness is usually not considered a reason in of itself for inceldom if it is unaccompanied by other factors.

 

 

==Chadsplanation==  

 

[[File:40daysand40nights.jpg|thumb|right|<center>Normies, when not lying to incels about celibacy being easy, will joke about 40 days without sexual intimacy as complete savagery</center>‎]]

Since [[normie]]s, [[chad]]s, [[becky]]s, [[stacy|stacie]]s, [[tanner]]s, and [[brad]]s don't like to pair up people anymore, they tell incels it's near 100% incels own fault that they can't find a partner. This will usually be accompanied by self-help "[[platitude|advice]]". For example:  

 

According to Roman tradition, after the city of Rome was founded by the legendary Romulus, the city was originally inhabited by mainly male pioneers who had followed Romulus in establishing the city. Due to the lack of marriageable women, this lead to many Roman men becoming involuntarily celibate. The elders of Rome planned to redress this by sending diplomats to foreign tribes asking for arranged marriages between their women and Roman men. However, the neighboring tribes of the Romans deeply distrusted the Romans, and feared their ascendant power. This led to Romulus devising a ruse; where he established a festival (Consualia) dedicated to a newly discovered god named Consus. He then invited several neighboring tribes to attend this festival. The entire population of a neighboring tribe named the Sabines apparently attended the festival. Romulus had previously arranged with his men that, when he gave the signal during a feast attended by the Sabines, they would violently spring into action and abduct and run off with the Sabine women. This mass rape led to a war between the Romans and the Sabines, which concluded with a peace treaty being concluded between the Romans and the Sabines, (with the Sabine women acting as intermediary's between their new Roman husbands and their Sabine male relatives). This ultimately resulted in the two tribes being united under Roman rule.

It is very likely the term "Involuntary celibacy" was coined in 1739 by French writer and clergyman [[Antoine Banier]]. He used it in a sense that implied that customs at the time, that led to men and their families demanding a dowry in exchange for marrying a woman, resulted in some women being unable to marry, thus leading to them being [[femcel|incel]] (because female extramarital sex was heavily socially discouraged at the time). The frequency in use of the term seemed to increase in the 19th century (in the modern sense)<ref>https://incels.wiki/w/Incelosphere#Background</ref>, with a lull in usage of the term in the 20th century, before seeing a resurgence in interest in the topic in the 1990s.