Asperger's Syndrome is a developmental disorder that can contribute to someones inceldom. People with Asperger's often experience difficulty socializing and blending in with normies. On the other hand, they are often exceptionally good at recognizing patterns and investigating certain topics with intense focus. People with Aspergers are often targets of pick up artists who scam them into buying into their ineffective programs. People with Asperger's famously suffer from the, "Attraction ambiguity problem".
There is debate in the autistic community as to whether or not autism should be treated as a health problem or not. The "neurodivergent" or "neurodiversity" crowd argue the label is flimsy, stigmatizing, or they imply autism is good/neutral. Those opposed to the "neurodivergent" and "neurodiversity" movements claim that these movements downplay extreme behavioural and social issues in those diagnosed with extreme autism.
- 1 Free Lesson for Aspies
- 2 Link Between ASD and Celibacy
- 3 Extreme Male Brain Theory
- 4 Relationship between ASD, physical masculinity, and looks
- 5 Relationship between ASD and behavioral androgyny
- 6 Women on Aspies
- 7 Dating advice
- 8 References
- 9 See Also
Free Lesson for Aspies[edit | edit source]
Link Between ASD and Celibacy[edit | edit source]
69% of high functioning autistic adolescents want relationships, but almost none succeed[edit | edit source]
The adolescents upon whom parents were reporting were predominantly Caucasian (89.3 %) males (86.8 %) with a median age of 14 years (M = 14.51, SD = 1.96).
- 69.2% of adolescents with high functioning autism expressed desire for a dating relationship.
- 73.1% with high functioning autism expressed attraction to someone of the opposite sex, and 10.0% to the same sex.
- However, only 7.7% of this high functioning autistic cohort reported having had a relationship with someone of the opposite sex, and 1.5% with someone of the same sex.
- Only 1.5% of the group had sex.
Overall this group showed a normal amount of desire for sexual relationships, but a disproportionately low capacity to achieve them.
44.6% of high functioning adult autistic men remain virgins, despite high sex/relationship drive[edit | edit source]
A group of high functioning autistic men and women were evaluated and compared with healthy controls to assess their sexual and relationship desires and success/failure to achieve those desires.
44.6% of autistic men were found to still virgins among a sample with the average age being 35.7 years. (Note: This figure is likely understating the number of ASD men who are incel, as there are a disproportionately higher number of homosexual/biseuxal men with ASD compared to NTs. The researchers lumped these into a single group.) This is also despite men with ASD reporting having higher levels of sexual desire and masturbating more frequently then NT men.
Autistic men were found to masturbate more and have a greater desire for a relationship than normal neurotypical (NT) men. However, only 16% of autistic men were in a relationship while 82% of NT men were in a relationship. NT men were 5x more likely to be in a relationship than their autistic counterparts.
Autism did not so greatly reduce women's ability to find relationships with men, as 46% of women were able to have relationships, while only 16% of men were. It was also noted that Female ASD individuals were significantly younger at time of first sexual intercourse (then males with ASD).
This is possibly due to the fact that autism reduces an individual's capacity for emotional interaction, but normal men crave emotional interaction less than normal women, so this will disproportionately impair an autistic man's attempts to find a relationship vs. an autistic woman's. Another possible explanation is that autists, due to their atypical behavior and emotional recognition deficits, find it difficult to navigate complex social dominance hierarchies, and are also socially excluded because of these atypical behaviors.
Autistic men were also burdened with a dramatically greater number of paraphilias which are considered "socially taboo". These paraphilias which appear to be part of their disease state can only be imagined to make their difficulties in finding sexual and romantic success more difficult.
- Male ASD participants reported more frequent masturbation than male healthy controls (HCs) (P<0.01).
- ASD men reported a greater sexual desire for sexual intercourse than their HC counterparts (P<0.05, Table III).
- Of the individuals with ASD, significantly more women (n=18; 46.2%) than men (n=9; 16.1%) were currently in a relationship
Extreme Male Brain Theory[edit | edit source]
A major controversial theory of the etiology (cause) of ASD is known as the extreme male brain theory. The theory first proposed by the world famous autism researcher from the University of Cambridge, Simon Baron-Cohen, states that the major cause of ASD is excessive exposure to androgens (male sex hormones) during prenatal development. Baron-Cohen does not claim that persons with ASD are more 'masculine' then neuro-typicals, a point often lost on laymen. Baron-Cohen merely asserts that this 'extreme' masculinity takes form in a deficit of empathy in ASD individuals, as well as an increase in their mental tendency to attempt to systemise information they receive from the external environment, which a major cause of the obsessional interests and social deficits displayed by those with the disorder. The theory is supported by analysis on the amniotic fluid of children who were later diagnosed with ASD, which found evidence of elevated androgens (androstenedione and testosterone) in the placental fluid. However the relationship between these factors is likely complex; as later studies have also found evidence of elevated levels of estrogens in the pre-natal environment of those later diagnosed with autism. This is likely partially due to the activity of the enzyme aromatase in the placenta, converting some of the androgens to estrogens, and there is animal evidence that pre-natal estrogens can have a "paradoxical" masculinizing effect in the right context.
The complementary imprinted brain theory puts psychotic spectrum disorders (such as schizophrenia) on the opposite end of a spectrum from ASD, purportedly resulting from a conflict in the genomic imprinting between paternal and maternal genes, with an extreme genomic imprinting in favor of paternal genes being associated with ASD. This also corresponds with sex differences in empathizing vs systemizing , which find females are generally higher in empathizing and males highest in systemizing, with autistic individuals of both sexes typically displaying a more masculinized behavioral phenotype. These developmental theories are not necessarily mutually exclusive with the theories of ASD that attribute the etiology of the disorder to greater mutational load.
It has also been proposed  that ASD represents a 'failed' male evolutionary mating strategy adaption, whereas the disorders that are similar in their etiology and pathology in some respects to autism such as Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder(ADHD) and Anti-Social Personality Disorder (ASPD, commonly known as 'psychopathy') represent more beneficial adaptions in general , particularly the "dark triad" personality traits associated with ASPD, which are associated with a lower arousal threshold (less or no fear, desire for extreme stimulation, very low inhibition) and such are probably not 'trainable' but rather innate, contra r/TRP.
Relationship between ASD, physical masculinity, and looks[edit | edit source]
In apparent contrast with the extreme male brain theory, there is some research indicating those (male and female) are more physically androgynous then NTs, possibly contributing to the higher incidence of inceldom among autists. A study in the Journal of Neurodevelopmental Disorders demonstrated that males with higher levels of 'autistic traits' were generally more physically feminine then males with lower levels of autistic traits and vice versa for females. 
The authors hypothesise that it is possible that those with ASD have more androgynous physical appearance but more male brains in regards to systemising/empathising. However their findings are directly contradicted by another study using similar methodology, which found that pre-pubescent children with ASD were more facially masculine and those with more severe symptoms tended towards being the most masculinized, utilizing 3D face tracking software. 
One of the explanations given by the authors of second study are that the first study examined adults, while theirs studied children. It is possible (speculation) that the social victimisation and exclusion suffered by many autists results in higher levels of cortisol and the subsequent lowering of testosterone that results from high cortisol levels, leading to a higher Cortisol/T ratio, which may result in a incomplete level of masculization of the face and body during puberty. Other explanations the authors of the series of studies gave were possible methodological errors in the first study, and since autism is not a single concrete disorder and set of universal symptoms but a 'spectrum' of behaviours and neurological differences, there is the possibility that the autists higher in social deficits are the more masculinized ones, whereas those higher in systemising and obsessive interests are not.
In addition, there is evidence that those with ASD have less symmetrical faces than neurotypicals. For instance, a study in published in 2010 found evidence of "significant facial asymmetry" in boys with ASD, particularly in the supra and periorbital regions in front of the frontal pole of the right hemisphere of the brain. This could be caused by differences in brain grown or/and genetic factors, since the mothers of those with ASD generally exhibited similar facial asymmetry. This could result in those with ASD being, on average, less attractive as compared to NTs, due to facial symmetry being generally found to be a component of facial beauty.
In accordance with the blackpill there is also some evidence that the social difficulties that those with ASD face do not only originate with the neurological traits of the disorder, but also with how those with the disorder are perceived by others. An article in the scientific journal Nature  presented a series of studies that demonstrated that when shown photos and clips of social interactions(filmed via first person with a go pro camera) of a group of ASD versus neurotypical individuals, ASD individuals were, as a group perceived as significantly less attractive, dominant, likeable, and fun to 'hang-out' with. They were however, perceived as roughly equally trustworthy, smart and good to live near compared to NT controls. Their findings also demonstrated that the "negative first impressions of adults with ASD occurred only when audio and/or visual information was present, and not when the transcript of their speech content was evaluated. This discrepancy suggests that social presentation style rather than the substantive content of social speech drove negative impression formation of individuals with ASD."
Relationship between ASD and behavioral androgyny[edit | edit source]
In seeming contradiction to the "extreme male brain" theory of the etiology of ASD, there is also some evidence that ASD is associated with behavioral androgyny in both sexes. However, as stated above, the theory does not claim that those with ASD are more "masculine" in a sense that accords with cultural/biological definitions of masculinity. Merely that exposure to excessive levels of androgens in the pre-natal environment is one of the main causes of the disorder, and that this androgen exposure is associated with traits that masculinize the brain of those with ASD in certain contexts, such as causing less empathy and/or a greater tendency toward systemizing (e.g. an extreme exaggeration of the general male tendency to be interested in "things" instead of "people").
Regarding the behavior profiles typical of those with ASD, a study published in 2014 found that, using a modified version of the Bem Sex Role Inventory, those with ASD generally exhibited a more androgynous gender profile,. This was mainly based on those with ASD generally reporting having less of a competitive drive, poorer leadership abilities and lower assertiveness. However, women with ASD reported a greater masculinized gender identity, and two thirds stated they were tomboys in childhood vs one-third of control women.
Another study in 2010 found that those with ASD were 10 times more likely to be referred to a gender identity clinic than those in the general population.. This poses a problem to the extreme male brain theory of autism, because both sexes were equally likely to exhibit gender dysphoria. Whereas one would expect females to be dysphoric than males if the extreme male brain theory was true. However, the authors state that this form of gender dysphoria may be atypical, and could possibly be related to the obsessional interests often found in those in ASD. It was also found that, contrary to the majority of typical developing individuals with gender dysphoria, those in the study who exhibited both gender dysphoria and ASD were not attracted to their natal sex, but were attracted to individuals of the opposite birth sex.
Women on Aspies[edit | edit source]
Even when those with Aspergers do manage to get into relationships with women, likely primarily due to some making good betabux providers due to having high-paying careers demanding specialist skills, there is some evidence that these relationships are fraught with tensions and often unstable. A few choice quotes regarding the wives of Asperger men's view of their relationships:
After 23 years of marriage to an AS husband who is a good provider and basically decent person, all I can say is “DON’T DO IT. Run, run, run as fast as you can. You may love this person, but unless you also despise yourself, you need to leave the relationship as far behind you as possible.”
What do we do about aspie men? Do we just name and shame them on a website so other women can avoid? And what about the issue of being a man enough to confess you are an aspie, on the first or second date? Shouldn’t that be mandatory? This is a psych condition that badly hurts women like me, after all. I think we have a right to know.”
There is much more were that came from:
Aspergers men are a nightmare. I accidentally married someone with AS. And I stress ACCIDENTALLY, as I have seen the devastation that is “being” with one of these people. They should come with a warning and anyone displaying these behaviors should be tested in school so that us normal people don’t get trapped in something that ruins our lives. Yeah they’re all different yeah yeah, I know, some are worse than others. No one can be happy with these people. NO ONE. WHATSOEVER. Seriously. My life is devastated from one of these un-empathetic, desolate wasteland-of-emotions people. Learn to think like them? F*** that. That’s impossible and would require losing most of the characteristics that make us human, that allow us to connect to others.
Dating advice[edit | edit source]
There has been little research on what determines dating success among the few autists who have it. One study developed 3 key tips for autistic online daters:
- Be consistent in your online profile (attributes and interests).
- Be explicit about your autism.
- Frame your personality attributes and interests using positive wording
There is some evidence that autistic males may be compatible with autistic females (at least in the near-term that is):
- "Further, similar to speed-dating studies with typical adults, participants matched from speed-dating events led to electronic communication between couples, and dates for approximately one third of matches."
- "the content of participants’ conversations felt formal to an outside observer"
References[edit | edit source]
- Graham Holmes, Laura & Himle, Michael. (2014). Brief Report: Parent-Child Sexuality Communication and Autism Spectrum Disorders. Journal of autism and developmental disorders. 44. 10.1007/s10803-014-2146-2